You think YOUR weather is Bad???
It's -22 C in Toronto today. In case you are wondering what the heck "C" is, it's Celsius btw. This temperature equals to -7.6 F! Yep you heard me. Can humans survive in this weather BARELY!! How cold does it have to get before they cancel work???!

Oh and btw it's -33C (-27.4F) with wind-chill. So stop complaining about your weather and pray for us!

 
Go Britney... and Madonna!
(Anti-Britney people just SHUT THE HELL UP!)
I'm ADDICTED to the new Britney's video featuring Madonna, Me Against The Music (you will need Yahoo id to see it)

 
Muffin
I was eating my breakfast this morning, when a co-worker passed by my desk. There was this awkward moment when our eyes met. And I guess, to make this moment a little less "awkward", I said: "yep, just eating my muffin..."

 
I'm just Selfish
"I don't want a kid. Some people say they don't want to bring a child into this world, as if there's something wrong with the world...I don't feel any of that, the world is okay. I'm just really lazy. " - grouphug.us

Replace the word "lazy" with "selfish"... and you got my view on having kids!

P.S. Don't go to that site! You'll get addicted!... trust me!

 
Can I borrow your ultraviolet light please?
i don't know what it is about hotels but if you are a couple traveling together, you are guaranteed to have twice (or 3 or 5 or 10 times) as much sex than usual. isn't that true? and that thought really frightened me.. i mean just imagine how many cum splatters there are all over each and every single room in a hotel... beds, sofas, walls, carpets... it's all probably been covered with something disgusting at one point or another...

i'll be sleeping outside of my hotel tonight, thanks.

 
Smelling Like Roses
Yesterday I had to make a delivery to one of my clients. She lives in a gorgeous (read "expansive") part of city that I very much like. While walking down the sidewalk, admiring all the beautiful stores (that were still open at 8 o'clock at night!)... i stepped on a pile of shit. I thought no big deal... just wipe it off on the grass. But boy did it stick! There was nothing I could do to get rid of the smell.

So there I was, in a posh neighbourhood, approaching a million dollar mention, delivering high end (expansive) products... and smelling like shit! I don't think this client will be ordering anything from me any time soon.

The foul smell followed me all the way home. Finally when I got home I left my shit shoe outside which made my husband very curious.

This morning I got dressed and sure enough, out of 100 pairs of shoes, the shit shoes are the ones that matched my outfit the best. So I sat on the veranda scraping shit of my shoe this morning. When I was done with that, I sprayed sanitizing spray all over it... just to make sure no more shit smell would remain. I must say, so far so good... I'm smelling like roses today!

 
Grandpa's Accident
i just couldn't resist.. i had to put this up as an acknowledgment of cool/funny writing. I want my bosses to learn a sense of humour from these people :)

from WB & REPRISE RECORDS NEWSLETTER:
"Group e-mail is a wonderful, wonderful thing with just one drawback: the "reply all"; button. Like the throw rug at the top of the stairs, it seems harmless until the day grandpa trips and tumbles two flights down. At our record company, employees send emails when something cool happens, like an artist gets on the radio or a lead singer makes bail. That's good. This is bad: instead of responding in private, every over-caffeinated schlub on staff has to "reply all" in huge purple font with "way to go!", "great job!" or "I'll kill you for stealing my thunder you no-talent bastard." This nonsense is filling up our inboxes and distracting us from the spam about cheap sex and home loans. Make it stop. And don't "reply all" with your comments either."